Some time later I rolled over and bumped him. Very politely, as if he were saying 'sorry' or 'excuse me' Jellybean quietly said "Oh! Can you f**k off please, Mummy?"
I was so shocked - and horrified - he didn't say it aggressively, but I really dislike that he's heard it, and knows it, and used it. I firmly, but nicely, said that it was a nasty word that we don't use because it makes people sad - and he said "Oh, sorry!" then I said that instead of the F Bomb we say "excuse me" or even, if we're very cross, "move over please" - but never the f word. Yuck, F word, yuck!
I think he understood - and he is very good normally because we do make a really conscious effort not to swear in front of him - but we're obviously slipping up more than I thought.
I like to think my husband supports me in most things - and in trying very hard not to swear he does well, but he does put things on TV that he forgets will have swear words in when the kids are still up (which I tell him off for) and he couldn't back me up right away in that situation in the bed, because he was trying not to laugh audibly.
Some people think it's cute when small children swear, or funny, and I think when it's a real shock I probably do laugh on occasions - but not because I think it's hilarious, because I think it's shocking.
I really don't like that he's learned that word - and that this isn't the first time he's said it; we're going to make a really concerted effort not to swear - clearly we haven't done well enough - and if we slip up I've told Jellybean he has to put me us the naughty corner!
Have your kids sworn, or said something they really shouldn't? Were there witnesses? Tell me all about it - link up or comment! (Mum, Dad, that doesn't mean you - we all KNOW I was awful, and no doubt a real potty mouth - I blame the parents! ;-) haha!)
I think you handled it really well. Children will hear these things and try out saying them as they like to imitate adults. Swearing doesn't particularly bother me BUT a toddler swearing would. Remembering some TV isn't suitable to watch when little ones around is an odd one to get used to, it's amazing what they pick up even if they don't appear to be watching.
ReplyDeleteOur toddler has said "bugger" mostly because I am known to call the dog a "little bugger", this doesn't bother me too much but the f word really would. I am quite a grumpy driver and actually hope the sound of my noisy van drowns out the sound of my swearing.
I can't put the blame entirely on other people - I'm sure I swear more than I think I do - but to hear him say it really puts things in to perspective - I don't want him to be that kid, and I don't want to be that parent!
DeleteHubby and I were having an argument about swearing around the kids the other day. Mase said some cuss word, I don't remember what, and Hubs said we shouldn't swear in front of the kids which I disagree with. His parents never swore around him and mine swears like a sailor and out of the two of us he swears more (same went for my friends growing up). Mase rarely curses anymore, he used to drop the F-bomb when he was first parroting, but we told him that it was a bad word, and he could say fudge instead, so now on the rare occasion that he curses all we have to say is "watch your mouth" and he corrects himself with an "oh budge".
ReplyDeleteBudge is super cute! I'm sure it's just a parroting thing - he doesn't have a clue what he's saying - but I hate hearing such nasty words from his perfect little mouth!
DeleteMy husband doesn't curse -- it's kind of unnerving actually, how he doesn't, not at all! But his parents don't either, so he wasn't really exposed to it until he got older, and by then he had already adopted his method of verbally expressing himself.
ReplyDeleteI cursed like a sailor until I started dating him, and subconsciously stopped because he's frustrated :)
That being said, my kiddos don't curse because they very rarely hear swear words. Lucky for us it's all turned out this way because my 2-year-old repeats EVERYTHING he hears! ;)
(This is justlenae from Instagram, by the way! So fun to "meet" you online! :)
Lenae I'm so glad that you found a gentleman! I'm trying to turn our kids into people like that - but clearly I slip up more than I thought I did - and other people are influencing them too :-(
DeleteS (aged 3) first swore about a year ago, he told the cat to fuck off! - a phrase I know he heard from me! I was shocked and really told him off, I went off the handle too much though and he kept saying it for reaction. Luckily as his speech wasn't great the word he said kind of morphed and he would say 'oh batty sake' but we knew he meant 'f*ck sake. But at least others in earshot didn't realise what he was trying to say. We ignored it and watched what we said around him and he seems to have forgotten The F word.
ReplyDeleteHe has in the meantime learnt the word 'whatever' though! Which I also dislike the way in which he uses it when I tell him off!
Oh no! "Whatever" is almost as awful to hear as a swear word or - that curse of children - the tut!
DeleteHow do they manage to have so much attitude so young?! I wasn't expecting this until they were teenagers!
I've got a terrible potty mouth and as much as I try I do slip up. Like today, I forgot lil miss was in the car with me as she wasn't throwing a monster strop for a change & I called someone a silly bar....... for talking on their phone while driving on the ice rink that was the road today. Thankfully on this occasion I caught myself, but I know there's other times I don't.
ReplyDeleteBut it's not just swear words, they can repeat all manner of phrases & it sounds awful, a while back the dog went & rolled in horse manure & we had to drive an hour back with her stinking out the car. I called her a minging dog without thinking & we drove home to chorus's of 'minging dog, minging dog, minging dog....' was only then I realised how awful it sounded!
I think Corinnes right, you did handle it really well, it's so hard to completely stop but it does make you really think when you hear it from their mouths!